|
SCUBA diving is
a serious sport. Everytime you dive you strap a life support system to your
back. But hey, we're recreational divers which means we're looking to
have fun. So while we dive, we're carful and serious. When we're out of the
water, it's anybody's ball game. So enjoy some jokes while you're topside.
(since I strongly discourage the practice of taking a laptop computer underwater
with you.)
How
to avoid shark attacks:
1.Never
Leave Utah
2.Roll in
manure before diving. Sharks hate anything breaded
3.Always
dive with a buddy. On sharks approach, point to buddy
4.Dive with
a briefcase. Shark may mistake you for an attorney and leave you alone out
of professional courtesy.
1.Funny Tan
Lines
2.Big Watch
3.Says
"Huh" alot
4.Bad
shocks and springs in car
5.Scars
from trigger fish bites
6.Expertise
on anti-histamines
You
can spot old time divers by:
1.Funny
Tan Lines
2.Big
Expensive Watch
3.Old
Jeep with bad shocks
4.Log
Book has volume a number on the cover.
5.Deaf
in at least one ear.
6.Has
multiple scars.
7.Has
cylinders older than you are.
8.Talks
about making their first wet suit.
9.Dive
gear is faded.
10.Limps from Dysbaric Osteonecrosis.
You
can spot newbie divers by:
1.Sunburned
2.Timex
Watch
3.Nice
car
4.Fills
in all the blanks in their logbook
5.No
diving related scars
6.Says
"Wow, did you see that" alot
7.Equipment looks nice
8.Perfect hearing
Don't
worry about this dive UNLESS..______ !
(fill in from below)
1.You hear the theme music from JAWS
2.You see someones foot hanging out of a fish's mouth
3.All the fish on the reef disappear
4.You see the boat pass you going down while you're on the anchor
line.
|
